No news

I won't keep you in suspense any longer.

We have heard nothing.

We'll see what next week brings.

I am not stressed. I keep thinking each day helps me prepare more.

Could today be THE day??

Birth mom is meeting with her CW today to look at our profile and a few others. Since she already knows us her CW says she may not need to meet with us to make her decision. I'm not holding my breath that she could choose this quickly but anything is possible!

Children everywhere!

I received an e-mail earlier this week about 2 children, a boy and a girl ages 6 and 4. Our caseworker send our file to the children's caseworker. The children's CW is on vacation until Monday so she'll start looking at all the files next week and go from there.

Tonight we got home from work and there was a message on our machine from another CW with our agency. She works out of a different office than our CW and she wanted us to call her. Her message said that she is working with a birth mother who is making her adoption plan and she mentioned us by name. Bells and whistles went off and I instantly thought of the baby my friend G told us about. I called the CW back on both numbers she left and I had to leave her a message. She called back about an hour later.

Sure enough it was about that baby. How ironic that we are going through the same agency but different programs. Anyway, this CW is going to contact our CW and get our file. She's going to put our file with some others for the mom to go through. She hasn't made a definite decision yet but she is leaning toward an open adoption.

I can't believe all the calls we are getting. I am hoping the CW's will work together and keep us up to date on what is going on in all fronts. We don't want to miss out on something good because we are waiting for what we think will be better. I pray for clarity and wisdom in the choices we may need to make!

A good day

I had a great day today. Actually, it's been a great week.

I took Thursday and Friday off so I could help with my cousin H if needed. My uncle had his surgery Tuesday and came home Wednesday and he is doing great. The cancer was isolated to the prostate and they could not see any spread. Yay for them! Since he is doing so well H has not been over.

Thursday hubby and I ran errands and yesterday I stayed home and vegged. Today I picked my mom up at 9:30 and we spent the day shopping and had lunch. It was a nice day and Mom and I should do it more often.

When I got home I unloaded my bags, played with the dogs and then got the mail. And, there it was. An envelope from DHS. With our foster license and our ID cards. It finally came!!!

We went out to dinner tonight with my Aunt M and Uncle W to celebrate. They have 3 children, one of which is from China. They have been our biggest cheerleaders during the whole adoption process. They are our age and are our best friends.

All in all, it was a great day!

Listen to this!

If you have time, listen to this. I didn't catch the first part yesterday but something I heard in part 2 hit me right between the eyes. It happens at about the 10 minute mark so if you want to skip ahead you can but this is worth listening to, every minute. His philosophy is profound and could be helpful to any of us longing for what we don't have. I'm going to go back and listen to part 1 based on what I heard today!

Happy Anniversary, Baby!!

On this, our 14th wedding anniversary, I want to honor the man I married. This list is in random order and written very fast. It is in no way a complete picture of the man I married but it's been fun to do!

1. I love him and he loves me. Unconditionally. Thick and thin, that's us!

2. He is one of the most kind hearted men I know. He can see a child crying, pick them up and wipe away their tears, make them forget why they were crying in the first place.

3. He is strong. And not just physically. At times he can come across as hard but he sees the worst in life working in the jail. He doesn't let it jade him.

4. He's a man's man - hunter, fisherman, hockey player, biker. If it's a manly thing to do, he does it. And we have a garage full of stuff to prove it!

5. He's sensitive. He cried when my grandfather died. He truly loved my grandfather.

6. He loves his parents. He goes over there every day off to eat lunch with them.

7. He has a great sense of humor. Not a day goes by where we don't crack-up about something!

8. He keeps up with all my whims. From animals to foreign exchange students to rolling bandages for Haiti to food drives to the women's shelter....he just smiles and nods and supports me 100%.

9. He fits in perfectly with my entire family. He comes from a huge family, too, so he was totally at ease from the first moment. And they love him!

10. He's a super man. I've written before about his amazing timing and being in the right place at the right time. He is just amazing sometimes!

And, he's all mine! Here's to many more years of wedded bliss!

A very special 4 year old

Don't get excited, he's not ours!

E and I have been entertained on Thursday nights by my 4 year old cousin, H. He comes over on Thursdays while his grandparents, my aunt and uncle, go to meetings. My uncle is a recovering alcoholic and attends AA. My aunt has her own group of spouses of alcoholic's that meet on Thursday night as well.

H is a very busy boy. You have to keep him busy and he won't play by himself. We're working on that in very small increments but 3 hours a week isn't enough. I got 5 minutes while cooking dinner Thursday night before he got bored and came looking for me. That is progress! We are exhausted when he leaves but I always fall asleep Thursday night with a smile on my face thinking of something he said or did.

H is being raised by his grandparents because his mother walked away from him, and the rest of her family, when he was just 2 years old. He stayed with grandma and grandpa one weekend while mom went out of town to visit friends and she never came back.

My aunt and uncle are doing an amazing job raising him. My uncle just turned 62 and my aunt will be 60 in February. My uncle was diagnosed in August with prostate cancer for the second time in 5 years. He is having surgery on Tuesday at U of M to have his prostate removed. H is staying home with his great aunt and I took Thursday and Friday of next week off to help out as well.

H understands that grandma and grandpa are leaving town for a few days. He understands that grandpa is having surgery and that he is not going to feel well for quite awhile after. And H is scared. He's always afraid he won't see someone again. I guess even though it happened when he was 2 he remembers mom going away and not coming back. When he leaves our house on Thursdays he cries and says it will be forever before he sees us again. I guess a week feels like forever to a 4 year old.

Mom is just starting to come back into his life this past summer. She comes up every few weeks or so for just a few hours. His heart breaks every time she leaves him again. My heart breaks for him.

I cannot understand why a mother would leave their child. I cannot understand what mother would not want to see their child every minute of every day, most days anyway. I only have him for 3 hours or so one day a week and I want him more!

My aunt and uncle know that if there ever comes a time when they cannot take care of him anymore we would gladly take him. We love him so much! My aunt has said we would be their first choice if mom was not in the picture. That way they could still be grandma and grandpa and they only live a couple of miles from us.

I pray daily for H and my aunt and uncle. I pray that God gives them the strength they need to bring this little guy up proper and the strength they would need to give him up if it became necessary. I also pray for energy and patience for them. They need it!