A very special 4 year old

Don't get excited, he's not ours!

E and I have been entertained on Thursday nights by my 4 year old cousin, H. He comes over on Thursdays while his grandparents, my aunt and uncle, go to meetings. My uncle is a recovering alcoholic and attends AA. My aunt has her own group of spouses of alcoholic's that meet on Thursday night as well.

H is a very busy boy. You have to keep him busy and he won't play by himself. We're working on that in very small increments but 3 hours a week isn't enough. I got 5 minutes while cooking dinner Thursday night before he got bored and came looking for me. That is progress! We are exhausted when he leaves but I always fall asleep Thursday night with a smile on my face thinking of something he said or did.

H is being raised by his grandparents because his mother walked away from him, and the rest of her family, when he was just 2 years old. He stayed with grandma and grandpa one weekend while mom went out of town to visit friends and she never came back.

My aunt and uncle are doing an amazing job raising him. My uncle just turned 62 and my aunt will be 60 in February. My uncle was diagnosed in August with prostate cancer for the second time in 5 years. He is having surgery on Tuesday at U of M to have his prostate removed. H is staying home with his great aunt and I took Thursday and Friday of next week off to help out as well.

H understands that grandma and grandpa are leaving town for a few days. He understands that grandpa is having surgery and that he is not going to feel well for quite awhile after. And H is scared. He's always afraid he won't see someone again. I guess even though it happened when he was 2 he remembers mom going away and not coming back. When he leaves our house on Thursdays he cries and says it will be forever before he sees us again. I guess a week feels like forever to a 4 year old.

Mom is just starting to come back into his life this past summer. She comes up every few weeks or so for just a few hours. His heart breaks every time she leaves him again. My heart breaks for him.

I cannot understand why a mother would leave their child. I cannot understand what mother would not want to see their child every minute of every day, most days anyway. I only have him for 3 hours or so one day a week and I want him more!

My aunt and uncle know that if there ever comes a time when they cannot take care of him anymore we would gladly take him. We love him so much! My aunt has said we would be their first choice if mom was not in the picture. That way they could still be grandma and grandpa and they only live a couple of miles from us.

I pray daily for H and my aunt and uncle. I pray that God gives them the strength they need to bring this little guy up proper and the strength they would need to give him up if it became necessary. I also pray for energy and patience for them. They need it!