Dawning of a new era

I was thinking this morning about the fertility bracelet. I wore that bracelet for almost four years. I didn't really believe in its power but I thought, why not give it a try? The thing is, I was supposed to be pregnant when it broke. I am not. Today is cycle day 1.

Thus ends nearly 12 years of the quest for pregnancy. I will still chart my temperature every day. It gives me a good clue as to when my next period will actually start. I may even use my fertility monitor for a few months yet as I have enough test sticks to last a few more cycles. I think I will stay on the progesterone indefinitely. I like how I feel when I am on it and it has definitely helped lengthen my cycles. But this is the end of an era. Infertility will not enter conversation about myself any longer. I will no longer let it define me. Today begins a new era. An era of becoming an adoptive mother.

I am headed downtown to our Christian bookstore this morning and then going to my in-laws. My brother-in-law and two of my nieces are up for the weekend and I want to see those two girls. They are so darn cute and so much fun! And, I am going to shoot my gun a little bit today. But mainly, I want to talk to my mother-in-law about adoption. I plan on pulling up the Michigan adoption website and showing her the children I have been praying on. I don't know if my hubby has talked to her about adoption but I would be surprised if he hasn't. He is over there on every one of his days off. He is so close to both of his parents and now that they are both retired they are all closer than ever. I want to gage her response to us adoption older children. We will not be able to do this without their unconditional support. I'll let you know what happens! Hopefully I don't end up crying as I am feeling rather emotional today.