I attended the placement permanency meeting yesterday and let me tell you, it was interesting to say the least! There are 5 children, 4 fathers and 1 mother who is incarcerated. Mom's concern is that her kids should be with family. Understandable. She does not like the youngest 2 being with strangers. The other 3 kids are with their dads but the youngest boys dads could not be reached on Friday. Thus, they came to us.
The father's are all going to file for permanent custody. Mom does not want the youngest 2 split up but they have different fathers. There is a great aunt and uncle who are willing to take they boys but now all the interested parties need home studies and inspections. The aunt and uncle need to get a foster license to take the youngest boys because the boys are now in the state's care.
What a mess! I have never attended such a circus of a meeting. There were 5 DHS workers, me, the aunt and uncle, a father, a step-father and the boys attorney all present at the meeting. Attending via phone conference were mom, 2 dads, an aunt (the one I went to school with), a grandparent, and 2 of the workers from our agency. Every one wants the kids! I sat back and kept my mouth shut. I know the primary goal is reunification, I knew that going in. Yesterday confirmed that firmly.
Our new agency case worker is coming for a home visit tonight. He is brand new and very excited to have a case. We are also going to have a visit from the boys attorney soon. We just found out yesterday who the boys doctor is so we'll be setting up an appointment for physicals very soon.
E came down with the stomach flu yesterday morning so the boys went to my in-law's. My MIL told me she loves her bio grand babies but these 2 behave so much better! My heart swelled. When I walked in their door last night both of the boys ran to greet me with hugs and kisses. Strangers, indeed!
I had an interesting conversation with both boys in the car driving home. I told the boys we were almost home and C said he didn't want to go home. I asked if he didn't want to go to my house or his parents house. He said his house. He said they are mean to him there. I asked him who was mean and he said Daddy. He said Daddy hits him. And Mommy hits him. D piped up like he always does and collaborated C's story. I don't know what to believe. I don't see how small children can really make that up. It must come from somewhere. I wrote down the conversation when we got home and I'll talk to our CW about it tonight. I know it's not my job to compile evidence against this mother.
I had better run and get myself ready for work. The boys are going to the in-law's again today. Eric is taking today off but he is still feeling pretty crappy. MIL has been just super supportive and has so much fun with those two!
Jane 23
5 months ago
12 comments:
I am just getting caught up on everything... Whew! I am so so so excited for you! I hope this all works out for you and E.. :)
This is just sickening.
I have a feeling I know how it will end, and it's NOT in the best interest of the child.
Keeping these two angels in my prayers.
:(
Unbelievable what some children must endure. Thank God they have your care and love, no matter how long or fleeting. Oh, I wish they could stay with your forever!
As I said before you have alot of strength and courage for your loving presence in these two boys lives. Prayers to you and your DH.
You amaze me. Foster parenting is one of the most self less things anyone can do.
Praying for you and your husband to feel the peace of God through all this chaos!
Wow, what a mess! Even though it isn't your job to compile evidence, I feel like you are completely right to give the info to the social worker. I agree that it's hard to believe that a small child would make that up. Especially if the older one is corroborating.
Praying for you guys!
What a circus! Those poor boys are so much better off with you. I definitely think you should tell the social worker what the boys are saying...I don't think it's compiling evidence, I think it's acting in the best interest of the children.
Those poor boys! It definitely sounded like a circus! I can't imagine all those different dads and kids! I can't even begin to imagine the lives of chaos that they've lived!!!
You seem to have such a good perspective and balance on the whole situation and what your role is and I really admire that. I can't imagine...
wow. The poor boys. I wish that what was in their best interests was paramount as opposed to reunification.
Oh my gosh YES! Compile evidence! Poor little guys...but so fortunate to have you (even if it's just for a little while). I am loving every detail of this - please continue posting bit by bit. I'm captivated!
I can see how much joy these children are giving you and your husband. I hope they can stay with you forever. I am anxious to read an update, and I hope it's a good one. No matter what, you are giving them the priceless gift of love and good care.
I just hope you haven't posted because you are busy keeping up with the little dears. I love how your MIL and mother are part of the story too.
You are not compiling evidence, you are passing it along to the proper authorities. The boys are giving you evidence, and you are doing the right thing by telling the case worker.
How are the blister and the nosebleeds?
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